Friday, May 9, 2014

scattered but ready

Tonight I find myself looking back over my day - full of making sure I have life's details worked out as an individual, a wife, and a parent (I'm leaving for my solo/1st camino in 5 days time) and I'm feeling so scattered!  It's not 'like' me to feel like this.  I want to (& I imagined I would) feel prepared, confident, and peaceful at this point - yet I find I am worrying about minutia.....will the plants get a drink of water, will the icky things get cleared out of the nether regions of the refrigerator while I'm well as the profound; have I left myself time and space not for packing and weighing and worrying, but for spiritual reflection and guidance before I begin the physical and emotional journey I'm so close to getting started on?  Like a dream in which I've prepared for a big moment, only to find that I've taken the spotlight in my undies....I'm feeling vulnerable.

It's funny how I can stress about what will be out of my control at home while I'm away- yet still have not have purchased a train ticket from Paris to St Jean Pied de Port on Thursday and I think that'll work itself out.  

Scattered yet ready- Kerstin.


  1. Wow, just 5 days! I'd be stressing too. Me thinks that all those little things at home will take care of themselves and you probably know that too. Once you start walking it will all fade into the background and you will be able to concentrate on the reasons for your camino. Wondering if you decided to blog while you're walking? As part of my preperation for my Camino next year I'm reading blogs and just about anything I can get my hands on so I will be traveling vacarlously (?) through you.

    Buen Camino Kerstin, enjoy this special journey.

  2. I know you've gone and are now quite a few days into your journey, but I wanted to wish you well. I can't see you blogging while you're gone. I'm sure you'll be in touch with loved ones along the way, but will probably not be wanting to bring too much technology into the picture during this experience. I'm sure it will be hard not to though, just wanting to share all you are seeing and feeling, or perhaps not. I really can't say. I just hope all your apprehensions about your time over there have eased away and that it is proving a positive experience. :)